New blog

I blog.  I've blogged for years and enjoy it.   But I wanted to start a new blog to track this journey I am on to discover the me that I know is still inside me and I want to meet her again.

I'm fat.

There I've said it.  It's out there for the world to see.  Or perhaps one or two people that may read along.  But most importantly it's me admitting it.  Sending it out into the great universe.

I ACKNOWLEDGE IT.

Oh I'm the master at disguising it, although right now there's no real disguising it at all.   But I've done all the sucking in, shoulders back, wearing black, posing in photos with my head over the shoulder of someone (no full body shots and no double chins that way!!!) I've done it all.  And I'm sick of it.  And it's made me tired.

I've been a yo yo all my life.  I remember back to my 30th birthday, I had just done Weight Watchers and was almost down to my goal weight.  Hey, I was wearing shirts tucked into my jeans with a belt on.  I was rockin'.  But it went back on and then some.

I've gone back to Weight Watchers, never quite made it that far again.
I've done Tony Ferguson.
I've done a private dietitian.
There was another attempt at Weight Watchers.
I've done Lite n Easy.
I've even drank boiled parsley water, urrgh, gag.
I've made deals with myself.
I've starved.
I've gone low carbs, no carbs, high protein, milkshakes.
I've done it all.

And now I'm fast approaching 50 and I'm tired.

Then a couple of weeks ago three completely unrelated people in my life who have no connection to each other mentioned 12WBT.   One, two three.   Coincidence?  I got onto Google and read and read and read and sometimes cried.  I've gone onto You Tube and did a lot of crying.   The stories, the photographs, the philosophy.

12 Week Body Transformation with the amazing Michelle Bridges.

Something clicked. I signed up immediately.

I'm in the middle of pre-season and even the small changes I've made to my life are working.   And I'm feeling so pumped and strong and in control.  Sure that might be fleeting, but I am really going to give this a red hot go.  And already in pre-season I've lost 2.7 kg.   Wonderful.

This is the start of my journey.  My FINAL journey to finding that girl that I used to know and I really liked her, I want to meet up with her again.