Red flag days

I survived my first really big red flag day for this round yesterday, it was my birthday.  I'm going to call it a red flag DAY, as it could have been easy to let my guard down.   And because we have another red flag event tonight for my stepson's 18th birthday, I decided a meal in at home for my birthday yesterday was a good choice, rather than dining out. 

We still indulged but it was a controlled indulgence.   Everything in moderation right?   I made a delicious porterhouse steak and a green salad with a home made citrus dressing, ensuring I had the smallest piece of steak.   And I just knew I couldn't be trusted with birthday cake this year.  It's not so much the piece of birthday cake, it's the fact that I couldn't trust myself not to eat the whole leftover cake the next day.   So I thought a small individual dessert cake from the bakery (with a few cut up strawberries on the side) was a better choice.  Once it was gone it was gone.

The cake was delicious, orange almond baby cake, and I think my wish when blowing out the candle was that it didn't have a million calories!!

Today I have been extra good and really upped my water intake and exercise and really controlled my calories.  The 18th birthday is being held at the same place I had dinner with the 12wbt girls recently, so the menu is a known quantity so that's always a good thing to feel empowered when ordering.  Plus I have my new black dress to wear.  It will be interesting seeing the faces on my stepchildren, I think the only dress they've ever seen me wear is my wedding dress.   

Funny, but not, I'm actually looking forward to getting back to work next Tuesday.   Two weeks off is always a good thing, not going to work is a great thing, but boy it can get a person out of routine.  

High time for a reward

I had decided it was high time that I rewarded myself for the hard slog it's taken for me to get to the point of 16.6kg gone forever, that I had booked a facial and back massage for today.  OMG it was to die for.  

The back massage, oh it was so good.  I really didn't realise how much I was hurting until I felt truly relaxed. Funny that.  She made the aches and pains literally disappear.  But it was the facial where I felt well and truly spoilt.  The scents were divine.  The products used were amazing.  By the end of it I felt well and truly energised, ready to give my all to this round.

This is not something I do regularly, in fact I've worked out the last facial I had was about 25 years ago!  But I tell you it is definitely going to be my carrot in this program.  At the end of the current round I'm going to do it all again ... so yep, that carrot is dangling.  It was a perfect reward for me right here right now and really has made me feel terrific today.

I read a post on the 12wbt forum written by ToughMudder the other day which really resonated with me.  This very wise woman has lost 62kg, woah!  What an inspiration.  She mentioned that there is no easy way in this journey.  Oh boy, I think I've worked that one out.  But just to keep chipping away at the numbers until there's nothing left to chip away at.

At weigh in on Wednesday I had lost only 100 grams.  I was instantly disappointed after all the hard work and calorie counting.   On Tuesday at the gym I even ran 1.5 km this time non-stop which is flipping incredible, all thanks to my work out buddy Tania and her unfailing motivation.  And then bang, on Wednesday, only 100 grams gone?!?  Are you freaking kidding me scales? 

And then I remembered ToughMudder's post.  And I realised that 100 grams is yet another chink gone, chipped away.  So I do appreciate that post, it's great how someone's words can really make a difference when it counts.  

AMEN!

This is the face of happy...

I took a 'selfie' last night, is that what you call it?  Anyway there was no one else around and I didn't have time to set up my tripod for my camera, so the mobile phone it was.  We were going out to a dinner last night and I was happy.  REALLY REALLY HAPPY!   I like going out to my husband's functions, but I usually dread the "what to wear" discussions I have in my head and it has caused all matter of stresses to me in the past.   But this time it was different.  I went through my wardrobe and I actually had a selection of clothes to pick from rather than the one obligatory going out outfit which was usually all that fitted.   I felt great.  There were actually some outfits I'd forgotten I had and I fell in love with all over again.

I felt happy, and confident and in control.  And it was a GREAT feeling!

The meal was an alternate serve type meal so Mike was great and asked me each time which looked like the lesser of two evils and swapped if I needed to.  Good man!

Entree was garlic prawns or satay chicken.  I had the satay chicken, which was cooked in batter so I shredded that off and just ate the chicken and a little bit of the satay.

Main was chicken coq au vin? I think that was it, anyway it was chicken and mushrooms and a sauce of some description on masses of mashed potatoes.  Thank goodness Mike had that, it was huge and I was worried about my will power.  I had the lamb which was a smaller serving, potato and broccolini.

Dessert was cake which had been decorated with berries.  I had a mouthful of cake and just ate the berries.

All washed down with water.  No wine for me.  This was a red flag event for me and I passed.  It felt good.

Next week spells two very big red flag events - my birthday on Friday and my stepson's 18th birthday party on Saturday.  Can we say ... "danger danger Will Robinson" and wave my arms wildly in the air???  So I'm going to up the exercise, up the water, and ensure the calorie counting is for every morsel that passes my lips.  And remember in the forefront of my mind that my new black dress that I am planning to wear on Saturday night does not call for any lumps and bumps, particularly as there will be an ex-wife in attendance.  Ha!  What better way to keep me on the straight and narrow.

Have a great week ahead everyone.

Successful shopping!

So whilst I'm on hols for work, I thought I might like a shopping trip down to Geelong, but couldn't be bothered driving so trained it down and back yesterday.  Great experience, and enough time, probably more than enough time, to do what I wanted.   Train got in around 8am and left to come home just before 2pm.  Perfect.

A few things on my list to do/see/get.  

I wanted to go to Big W as I still had not seen the Michelle Bridges range of exercise wear.   Only a small selection there, but I was very impressed at both the quality and price.   I ended up buying a pair of yoga pants, black with an electric blue waist line.  Very nice.  Although I will have to take them up.   I really liked one of the tops, it was black with a thick white trim, but that's where Mish has failed me  :-(    Maybe it's meant to be tight but I came out of the fitting room a bit demoralised when the size 16 pant fitted perfectly but even the size 18 top was too tight, uncomfortably tight.  Not only that, but way too low for my liking.   But I know that there will be a lot of people loving the top, so that's great.   Still fabulous quality.   Just thought the sizing might have been a bit more generous.   And yes it did go up to about a size 26, and I know it's just a number, but I just couldn't bring myself to try on a size 20 top.  Call me shallow if you will.

After that I went to Myer with the mission to purchase a sports bra.   I'm well and truly sick of needing to keep adjusting my bra, shoulder straps slipping down, etc.  And as it happened I ended up getting fitted for a sports bra and it was a totally wonderful experience.   The lady took such care with me, ensuring it was exactly what I wanted.   I ended up choosing a Berlei Electrify Underwire.  Then found out it was 25% off, so ended up buying two!

I really can highly recommend getting a proper bra fitting, particularly as when losing weight you really have no idea where you are sitting with regard to bra sizes.   These feel great, I tested them out jogging this morning!  

I got to the point where I decided lunch was in order and at the cafe at Westfield I tend to go to when down there, I was delighted to see that they actually had inserted a kj count alongside their menu.  Until I quickly did a conversion to calories in my head and realised heck!!! some of these meals were more than my daily calorie intake, just for one meal!  Ouch.  

So I made myself proud when I stayed within my lunch calorie allowance and ended up selecting a chicken salad with a citrus dressing.   Which despite being mostly lettuce, was absolutely delicious.  Paired with a skinny latte and I felt in power for sure.

Then I spent way too long at the wool shop, yep, a pretty sedentary past time of knitting, at least I have thin fingers, they get a good exercise!! 

So all in all a very successful day yesterday!

And I'm off and running ... literally!

After my highs of the last post, I had this horrible thought about that whole kilometre run (without stopping!) te he, I always have to add the "without stopping" now!   I woke up last night and thought ... what if the treadmill at Terang Gym is calibrated differently to the one at Snap Fitness that I usually go to.  Maybe a kilometre there isn't equal to a kilometre at the other.  Maybe that's why I've never been able to go the whole nine yards at Snap.

So today I went into Warrnambool and into Snap with one purpose in mind, to run the kilometre again without stopping.   

AND I DID IT AGAIN !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

It was quite the relief actually to know it was real, and I wasn't just a one run wonder.   I'm still feeling pretty chuffed with myself.

Funny thing happened just a moment ago.   I was standing in the kitchen when one of my husband's mates came by, a dear friend.  Despite living in the same little town, because I'm usually at work, Tony announced "hey I haven't seen you for ages".  So I stepped out from around behind the kitchen counter.  The look on his face was priceless.  He stared goggle eyed at me and spluttered "JEEEEEEZUS, WHAT HAPPENED TO YOU???" he then did the double take and just said "WOW". 

Well that certainly made me jump for joy.  I loved that reaction it was so great.   So I guess 16 kilos is quite noticeable.  

So weigh in yesterday and I was anxious after my disastrous start of this round with a gain, and I do use the word disastrous loosely, I know my gain was only 100 grams, but for me the perfectionist, seeing the line on my weight loss graph go up instead of down really did do my head in.   But jumping on the scales and I lost 1.4 kilograms.   Go me!  That made up for last week and then some.   

So my total weight loss since day dot now is 16.5 kg (about 33 and a bit pounds for my overseas friends).

So whilst I was in town today, after the gym I did a few errands, one of which was that I decided I needed to reward myself for coming this far, a good and decent reward.  I've booked myself in for a facial and back massage next week, and I'm so looking forward to it.  I've had one facial in my entire life and that was over 20 years ago I dare say.   So one might say it is overdue, and what perfect time to get one now is to celebrate 16.5 kg loss.   Funny thing though, the facial I've chosen is a special offer at the moment, it's a chocolate, mint and licorice facial !!!    I don't know what that combination of scents will smell like, but it sounds utterly delicious!   So roll on next Thursday.

So here's a question to you, if I may...

I'd like to ask for anyone reading this (does anyone read this??? LOL) ... what rewards have you given yourself for your goals/mini goals/achievements?  And if your answer is none.  I'm going to ask, why not?  So please share if you like.

To anyone who is reading this I hope you are on as big a high as me right now and getting on with the business of losing weight, getting fit, getting healthy and finding the you that you know is inside.  

A huge high today

From the highs and lows in the last post, I think I hit one of my biggest highs today.  I worked out with a new friend, a fellow 12wbt'er at the new gym over in Terang today, the gym she usually goes to.

I don't know whether it was the fact that I find this new friend hugely inspirational, whether it's because it was a new surrounding, maybe just something inside of me clicked.  But I won't argue with whatever was happening, because ...

Ready ...

Wait for it ...

I RAN 1KM NON-STOP TODAY !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Wooo hoooo, cue the brass band fanfare.  This is huge deal for me.  Okay so it was on the treadmill and I only ran at 7km per hour, slow and steady wins the race right?  But the big thing for me, the biggest, was that I didn't have to do the walk/run/walk thing.  Of course as soon as 1km hit I near on passed out, but we won't go there, right?

Not only that, but after working with the weight machines and the exercise bike, and even doing some sit ups during the session, Tania suggested I try for another km.  My instant thought was why ruin a good thing huh? Let me finish on this high.  But okay, I went for another 1km run.

AND I FLIPPING WELL DID THAT TOO !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  NON-STOP!

What a buzz.  I swear I've walked six feet tall all day today.

I mentioned in the last post that I was meeting up with some 12wbt'ers for an evening out.  It was great seeing these girls and talking about some trials and tribulations, and really getting to know them over dinner.  Incidentally I have a lot to learn when it comes to ordering.  One of the lasses impressed me with getting exactly what she wanted.  Hey, we're the customer right?   If I want sauce on the side I really should ask for it.  I just picked the safest looking dish I could find which happened to be a vegetarian dish, something in pre-12wbt days I wouldn't have looked twice at, but my goodness it was absolutely delicious.

My step-son is having his 18th birthday at the same restaurant in a couple of weeks and so I'm feeling like it might not be quite the red flag event I was scared it would be. 

In any case the funniest thing in getting our glad rags on and having a night on the town, was that a couple of the girls we didn't recognise with their hair down and not in the uniformed exercise ponytail!  Quite funny that.

Highs and lows

I've said before that weight loss is such a solitary journey.  The whole losing, getting fit, getting healthy. You can have the biggest support crew in your corner, but ultimately it comes down to one person.  YOU!

I was pretty pumped finishing Round 2.  I got an email from Mish telling me I finished in the top 15% which was a great boost and I felt pumped and ready to roll into Round 3 and hit the ground running.

I was on a high.

Then Wednesday came and I got on the scales ready for my first weigh in of Round 3 and I had gained 100 grams.  And for a perfectionist like me starting the round with a gain just about did my head in.  Of course Thursday morning when I weighed I had lost, and I almost toyed with the idea of changing my weight on the 12wbt site to my Thursday weight, but that would have screwed with my head even more.   I have to do this by the book, otherwise I'm only doing creative accounting.

So I was on a bit of a low at that point.

So I slapped myself around a bit and have really knuckled down and again am finding my way.  And tonight I'm very much looking forward to a get together with some of the Warrnambool & Surrounds 12wbt group, going out for dinner and drinks.  Yep, we may not be going to Perth for the finale, but we're still going to go out and have a lovely time.

So I'm back on a high again.

It's like a flipping roller coaster these games that my head plays sometimes.   I'm starting to get dizzy from it.   But I will keep on plodding along.   Does anyone else get like this?  Mind games.   Gaaaah.  

I need to remember this...

Oh no truer words were spoken.